Just so blessed in that department so I have no complaints. Just not for me” ) and a few of them just sort of drifted off into the never never land that is dating. Women who spend any time online know about all of the trolls and all of the shamers. I think once you become an adult, you become more interested in the WHOLE person and not the shell that person is in, ya know? In real life, I have never had any men (not to my face anyway) say anything negative about my big body… If they criticize you and put you down, you need to break up with them right away. Ain’t no one got time for that bull shit, as they say. Do not reply back with witty comments about their sad, pitiful life – no matter how good it might feel. “Please stop emailing me.” And then SAVE everything in case you ever need it.
And, for the most part, the online dating adventure has been exactly that. But, there have been a few interactions that have gone really really bad. As in “you fat bitch” and one that I reported to a friend of mine (who is a San Jose PD detective) that basically said I would be better off dead. Now, I am certain that this sort of thing happens to women of all sizes and shapes. Well, “you fat bitch” probably only happens to fat women. You can be a size 2 and get plenty of hate mail and comments. There are way too many amazing, uplifting people in the world to spend your days with those ass hats. And, if you find yourself being harassed online via email or message or texts, just keep replying with the words ” Please stop emailing me.” Or “Please stop texting me.” Be clear. And, when you get someone who is being rude via text or your cell phone – do NOT delete their telephone number from your phone.
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Every once in a while, I like to poll my readers on the Nerd Love Facebook Page and on Twitter to find out what issues they feel are holding them back when it comes to dating.
And then I suddenly found myself afraid to publish it so it's been in a folder for a few months.
I don't know why, but I finally felt like sharing it.
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Last week, the #fatshamingweek hastag was trending on Twitter as numerous assholes and shitbags took to the network and decided to mock fat people – mostly women, but men too – from behind the dubious anonymity of their Twitter accounts.
Now we could dwell on the fact that these various winners are not gym-sculpted Adonnises themselves, but instead I want to focus on the positive and work on people’s lives instead of trying to stroke the hate-boner.
I have never been “the norm.” I have been overweight all my adult life (see also heavy, curvy, voluptuous, fat, “BBW” — whatever term you want to use).
Well, I never really thought I would write this blog. I decided to cool down and wait 24 hours before I blurted it all out here. So, for starters, I have had two of the most amazing men in my life and two wonderful long term relationships in my life; I count myself super grateful and blessed.