Get more dating and relationship advice in by Patti Stanger.
About the Author Patti Stanger is the author of Become Your Own Matchmaker: 8 Easy Steps for Attracting Your Perfect Mate and the star and executive producer of her own television show, The Millionaire Matchmaker, on Bravo.
Her wildly successful matchmaking efforts have been featured on E! Phil, Ellen, Tyra, NBC News, The Big Idea with Donnie Deutsch and numerous other television shows, as well as in Marie Claire, Elle, Glamour, the New York Times, Forbes, The National Enquirer, the Washington Post and many more.
Some time ago, I wrote an article titled “7 reasons why you shouldn’t date a divorced man,” and I must say I was overwhelmed with the amount of responses this article received.
It may take a long time to recover—and that's okay. You know what it takes to make a relationship work, and what will make it crash and burn. Men are more likely to look at a never-been-married woman over thirty-five and ask, “What’s wrong with her? It sounds harsh to those of us who have never been married, but it’s true and the truth hurts me as much as anyone else, because, as you know, I’ve never been married. Divorced ladies, for all the trauma and heartbreak you’ve been through, consider the hard-fought advantages you’ve won: 1. You’ve been in the program before, you know all the signs, both good and bad, so you’re better able to assess if he’ll make a good husband. You can discern his interest level, and your own, much quicker. You also know that it’s better to be alone and happy than in a crappy relationship. And if your ex-husband was someone prominent in your community, your stock goes up even higher. They know that you’ve seen a man in gross old underwear before and accepted him, warts and all. Some of you mistakenly feel that because your marriage(s) ended, you’re at a disadvantage. To be honest, and you know I’m never anything but, divorced girls have a huge advantage. You’re not some starry-eyed twenty-something who runs home crying to mommy the first time your husband criticizes you. You know that, yes, you can recover from a heartbreak, and, no, he’s not the last man on earth. Men register this in their minds, whether consciously or subconsciously. Men love this, because they don’t feel the pressure to be perfect.Since their marriage failed, they don’t want a repeat performance, so they tend to assume the dominant role.So, they pick up a trick or two in their failed marriage and they use this to their advantage.