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Sitting around and listing every single thing your ex does wrong just so your child can get your ever-so subtle hint that his or her parent sucks is using your kid as a messenger boy or girl to deliver this sweet note: Let your child figure out on his or her own that a parent is a deadbeat!
Don't complain to your children; they're not your therapists. You squash all attempts for your ex to spend time with the kids. I say "his" because more often than not, but not always, the mother has more custody time than the father.
We all think we're raising our children to be good people. You know they can be dangerous for your family, but you may not know all the ways they enter your body, or -- most important -- how you can limit your exposure.
How much are we really prioritizing our child becoming a good person who cares about others?
You use your children as messengers between you and your ex.We have helpful advice on coping with separation or divorce.We also have all the details on adoption: the process, cost, and expectations.I should probably tell you first that I'm getting a divorce from a man who is a fantastic father. You're probably wondering, "What does she mean by using kids as a pawn? You blame your kids' mother or father by using the word "your" with disdain.father never does X or Y."That nasty little possessive pronoun "your" seethes with anger and every time you let a sentence like the two above rip, your child is full of resentment and guilt — that's his or her ex as if it's his or her fault. Not only are you damaging your children's self-esteem and stability, but you're also jeopardizing your relationship with your child down the line.2. I don't care if your ex is a deadbeat dad or mom; keep quiet about the deadbeat in front of your kids.