You can still set boundaries that are secure, but also allow the person you love in, but on your terms.
New Skills Asserting your boundaries can feel extremely uncomfortable and difficult at first but like many new, and beneficial skills you will gain as part of loving an addict, it will become easier as you practice and then perfect the skill of setting and protecting your personal boundaries.
"But the teachings of Buddha say we aren't separate," Sophie said. "This prompted Russell, another student, to reveal that he and his ex-wife, who share custody of their child, were working on boundary issues with a counselor.
"We never worked this out while we were married," he said.
Setting And Enforcing Boundaries An addict will do anything to manipulate, flex and violate your boundaries because they will in no way suit them. This is when you need to stand even stronger in your resolve because any shift of boundaries after this type of pressure will give your addict the message they can keep pushing your limits and you’ll always bend right back to where they need you.
Another threat of setting boundaries is losing balance and setting boundaries which are too rigid, so that you no longer connect at all with your loved one.
Try running your decision through the following principles. They are there to protect you and to help this person deal with the reality of her actions. Practice continual forgiveness – Don’t give negative attitudes a chance to grow – practice forgiveness day by day.Check out our new Mobile user friendly Landing Site for a brief overview of the work of Codependency Recovery Inner Child Healing Pioneer Robert Burney - including links to his articles on websites that are user friendly on mobile devices."The purpose of having boundaries is to protect and take care of ourselves.Respect is a necessary element for any couple to grow in love.Each person needs to feel that they are respected by the person they are getting to know.